Manic Street
by Murdoch Rouge of the Morgue
Summary: He would continue to hide; hide behind that ever so comforting smile, a happy wave, and he’d decided he could hide her too. Brion Markov, after all, was a simple man. An unorthodox Terra revival. On HIATUS!
1. A Simple Man

Manic Street

"Tara!" chimed the overzealous voice that had -- over the past few weeks – become all too familiar, "The sun says hello!"

Gruffly taking note of the young gentleman's commonly blissful voice, the aforementioned "Tara" pulled her dusty yellow bedcovers over her small, huddled body. "And I say goodbye!" the teenager groaned out in exasperation.

The door creaked open and the sound of weight shifting on the small apartment's floorboards informed the girl of all she gave way to knowing. He was standing in the doorway, firm hands on firmer hips, and a "you're being ridiculous" smile planted on his thin lips as he always was.

"You have a school to get to," Brion murmured with a tinge of amusement in his younger sister's unfailing laziness. "C'mon, I bet the Teen Titans are up _way_ before eight o'clock."

"Wrong." The blond barely coughed out recognizably as she trudged from the soft confines of her blankets into the brisk morning air, and over to her dresser, "_Teen_ Titans, Brion. Just like me."

Shaking his head, the young salary man sauntered into the kitchen, still yelping from his place to his less than responsible sibling. "Except they've got a duty to the city, whereas your duty is to your homework. You could really learn a thing or two from that green kid, you know; especially since you spend so much time with him…"

Tara adjusted the hem of her school uniform's skirt with her palm, flattening out the surprisingly stubborn wrinkles left from sitting among the other piles of laundry-yet-to-be-done in her bureau. "Oh, _fat_ chance! From what Beast Boy's told me, the only difference between my friends and the Titans are their abilities. It's not like he hangs around me because I want him to or anything. It's been _months_, and he's convinced I'm this ex-Titan 'Terra'. I sue for copyright infringement!"

Brion turned from the kitchen counter with his car keys planted in place in his palm, and was pleasantly surprised with the image of _his_ Tara Markov standing beside the front door on time, ready for yet another day of school. Urging her to go on ahead of him, the young man gave the comfortable home a "once-over" to see if he'd missed something necessary for the daily routine. Nothing prominent came to mind, or sight, for that matter. "Maybe he's delusional? Getting knocked out by super-powered baddies can do that to a person."

"I wouldn't go that far. It's a little sad that he can't find her, though. I just wish I knew what he was talking about sometimes, a-and sometimes I really do feel like I was _there_ when he—" she had started almost nostalgically.

The teenage student's guardian had slammed the car door shut much louder than necessary, thus cutting off her statement. He shoved the key into ignition and sucked anxiously at his bottom lip simultaneously as the engine roared to life. Cerulean eyes tweaked with confusion were glaring intently at him, he was well aware. He wouldn't address it, though. He never did. Those situations where she claimed to have remembered were far too odd to address with a proper and complete explanation.

Though, figuring some of the trouble could stand to be put at ease, Brion turned towards the short young lady and flashed a toothy smile, closing his similarly blue eyes to enhance the comforting effect his expressions seemed to have on Tara. As he'd hoped, she swallowed roughly and subtly changed the subject as the two swerved out of the apartment complex's parking lot and onto the main road.

"I haven't ever spoken to the others, though. Sometimes they'll send someone out to pick him up when he's stayed too late with me at the library, but they never say anything. The closest I've gotten was a smile and a wave from the alien,"

"Starfire," Brion corrected her almost automatically. A mistake he commonly made when his sister touched on the subject of heroism.

She gave him a wary look and continued on, despite the slightest of slight suspicion lurking about her mind, "Yeah, her. He brought me a soda from the place across the street, but she came for him right after and he had to go. She looked at me, though, never once at Beast Boy, and she kind of smiled and waved before they took off. She looked way more…sad than she does on the paper, or in magazines."

The young man chortled good naturedly almost directly after Tara stopped speaking, brushing one shoulder with the opposite hand. "Maybe she's delusional too, huh? Might opt to get out here, Tara."

It took quite a few tics of a clock for the blond to realize what he meant and reluctantly pushed open the passenger door and leapt from her seat with a smile a wave, and couldn't help but reminisce about that strange, strange day with Beast Boy and the alien heroine called Starfire.

He would continue to hide; hide behind that ever so comforting smile, a happy wave, and he'd decided he could hide her too. Brion Markov was a simple man. What with the gently mussed scarlet hair, sky blue eyes, and the most neighborly grin anyone could ever imagine, it would be strange for anyone to even consider anything out of the ordinary involved with him. Of course, not even the closest soul to him still bound to Earth – Tara – knew that there was something off…something secret. Then again, if he had his way, she'd never need to _care_ about the facts; about the truth.

And so, he drove off for work, waving goodbye back at the young girl, knowing full well there'd be more stories of the Titans awaiting him once he returned home that evening. Just as it always was, he marveled as he sped past the green orb of light on the traffic signal and down the same streets he'd passed each day before.

"Tara!" went two girls clad in the same uniform garb that was stretched across the pancake tone of the aforementioned girl's skin. They were just like Brion earlier in the morning, happy and excitable.

The blond had to sometimes remind herself how much she loved the sound of happy. Laughter, joyous tones…things of that sort. They weren't affected whatsoever by the plights the harsh Earth had to offer, and that was just how Tara liked it. Nothing to worry about but the impending quizzes and tests for the day, or even the day afterward, she would grin at the simplicity sometimes.

She jogged over to the two girls, Molly and Copper, grinning just as they had. "Hey. Great to see you, so, did any of you manage to study for that pop quiz everyone's been spreading rumors about?"

"Oh, yeah…" the conversation faded out as crowds upon crowds of teens in the same clothing moved past and into the school building. Shortly afterward, the bell sounded and every single student was, or should have been, in their seats and prepared to learn the lessons for the day.

Uneventful and unsurprising as usual, Tara had lamented to herself whilst a slightly amateur substitute teacher drawled on and on about the American Revolution. It would be another silent day at Murakami High, of that each student was sure. A thin finger absentmindedly entwined itself in tendrils of soft yellow, and Tara was content, if not a bit bored. Her mind prodded at the idea of what would happen today. Would Beast Boy be waiting outside the school's gates again? Would another elusive Titan stop by to pick him up when he was needed? Would they finally say something to her?

Now there was something to be anxious about, and a smile inched its way unto the young girl's round face without need for her control. Just as the teacher announced it was time to take notes, a rumble from erupted from the tile clad ground. The floor shook wildly and stopped all at once, sending each student in the room swaying in one direction, and landing a few places on the solid ground beside their seats.

"What was…?" the substitute grumbled as he picked himself up from the floor before glass was shattered and a huge hulking _thing_ flew in and hit the wall opposite its entry.

Shards of sharp, clear solidity danced roughly through the air before making their descent to either the tile in the classroom, or some fifty feet to Jump City's sidewalk. Some students close to the window had been injured, including the teacher, and a horrified scream was elicited from almost ever girl present in the room. Even a few boys and joined in the terror, and still few had left the classroom completely.

The wall was destroyed in its entirety, and the wall the strange creature had crashed into was immensely cracked and played around with the idea of following suit and crumbling as well. Tara leapt from her chair and backed up against one of the two still solid walls, her palms suddenly sweaty and trembling as she tugged at the hem of her skirt.

Her eyes stumbled to the heap of rough, massed solidity that lay on the floor a few yards away. It was moving, alive, albeit very slightly. Some brave souls moved forward to get a closer look at the beige hulk, others cowered in fear. Just as one boy - whom Tara knew as Kyle – reached out to touch the creature, it lashed out and stood at full height, puncturing the ceiling above with its head, and creating a well sized dent in the floor below.

The thing let out an arrant cry before leaping from the Murakami school building to the open air outside its walls. All was quiet for a few moments after the creature had left, and then the statement that each Jump City citizen knew by heart was heard ominously from what one could assume to be a nearby rooftop.

"Titans, _go!_"

Instantaneously, every student was at the gaping hole in the wall, watching the festivities unfurl. An arsenal of green blasts was let loose upon the creature, and a few teenagers cheered Starfire on as she worked at the villain from above. Harsh grunts of exertion and the pang of metal hitting a hard surface rang through the district as the Titans' leader and second in command, Robin and Cyborg respectively, beat at the creature from the floor of the rooftops in hopes of knocking it off balance.

"Don't worry about Cinderblock," added the familiar voice of a certain green super hero, as if he were in the very same room. "They've got it covered."

Tara, among others, turned to face the opposite end of the room with hopeful, sparkling eyed joy as dark energy molded itself into the wall and a young green boy and a slightly taller, illusory looking young lady emerged onto the classroom floor.

Raven the taller, more feminine of the two, swiftly sauntered to the wreckage and shrouded the pieces of rubble and plaster in black, placing each place back into the wall as means to fix it. "Sorry about the wall. _Beast Boy_ got a bit carried away when he charged him off the rooftop."

The boy was beside her immediately, a gentle hint of annoyance present in his features though a smile occupied his oddly hued face at the same time. "Oh, it was awesome and you know it."

"I was _shaking_ in my boots. Happy? Now make yourself useful." The empath retorted dryly as she elevated a desk to his position with little more than a thought. "We can't leave the room like this."

"I don't even clean up my _own_ room, and you want me to…" he grumbled, picking the piece up and putting it in proper position.

Tara nearly choked as she tried to get out a coherent sentence to say to each of the Teen Titans. She couldn't believe it, she and the rest of her class were caught in between one of the many battles Jump City's local heroes went through each and every day. And there was _another_ one! _And_ she was talking!

"B-Beast Boy!" she clamored eventually, though stumbled forward slightly at the same time.

Right on cue, the animal turned on his heel with a good natured smirk. "Hey Terra! Sorry we crushed your classroom."

The girl took a few more cautious steps towards the boy she'd like to think she could call a friend. "Don't uh, don't worry about it. You're just doin' your job and all…"

"Y'know you could be helping us now. Beating Cinderblock and all, I mean."

"_Beast Boy_," Raven scolded from a few feet away; following orders, most likely.

Garfield sighed and turned to his teammate, his emerald eyes solemn and more sunken than usual as he pleaded with the girl for answers. Raven only shook her head at him, shutting her eyes as such, and went back to her work. She'd read his mind, and sent a clear enough message that whatever he was thinking had to stop indefinitely. Even Tara could understand the situation, despite having no confirmed knowledge of any of it whatsoever.

"Rae, BB! Look out!" sounded a raspy screech. That's Cyborg, Tara's mind had answered the question just about to waltz off her lips.

The mysterious young woman's eyes snapped open and immediately all that she had supported in mid air with her mind had fallen roughly to the floor. She looked terrified for but a moment though she soon folded her legs and levitated in air, chanting whimsical words faster than she ever had before.

"_Zinthos_!" Raven shouted finally, and thus the entire school was engulfed in that cold, unknown black energy. An ominous _thud_ filled the still air inside the bubble the school had been immersed in, and all was still for quite a while afterward.

"What is she..?" Tara inquired, her eyes searching Beast Boy's for an answer. She fought off fear as the sense of cold settled inside the empath's shield, her hand finding the path to Beast Boy's arm.

He coughed into his glove enshrouded hand and turned to his frightened old friend. "Waiting for the coast the clear, probably. She can sense things…maybe Cindy's still waiting for the shield to go down."

"Actually, I'm waiting to hear Robin's plan." She murmured as she repeated the phrase less and less audibly each time, "Azarath Metrion Zinthos..."

Beast Boy chuckled happily to himself as he could just _feel_ the confusion emanating from the girl beside him and graciously offered her explanation. "Our job was to keep the school safe. Star, Vic…er…_Cyborg_, and Robin are supposed to take 'im down."

It took only a few louder thuds before both of the Titans' communicators vibrated with the same tone. It was Robin, who panted slightly as he conveyed the message to the two members of his team. "We're done here. Let's get him to the confinement cell and start the investigation. Meet you outside."

Raven exhaled heavily and the dark energy receded into her body, her head darting upward as she inhaled after all returned to its normal state. The dark haired teenager looked back to the changeling, a frown pressed firmly into her spectral gray skin. "You heard him,"

"Yeah, I know." He muttered and shuffled his boot across the classroom floor childishly. "Later, Terra." Garfield jogged into place in front of Raven, and this time they both waved, with that same melancholy smile Tara had begun to see much too much.

She'd lifted her hand to wave too, but they were gone via shadow portal in an instant. Tara frowned and allowed her hand to drop dejectedly to her side. She shouldn't have been as let down by the occurrence as she was. They were super heroes, and she was the girl that one of them had hoped were like them. She wasn't. She couldn't have been. No matter how much she wanted to be.

**A/N:** **So, tell me what you think! I'll continue after three reviews. A little word about me, whenever I finish one project, I continue right afterward. So, since this chappie is finished and posted, I'll be working on the second one in moments. All I need are reviews to keep this up! Thanks for reading! **

**~ M. Rouge**


	2. Where Reality Ends

Disclaimer: I, unfortunately, don't own Teen Titans or any related media. I do love the series and characters more than any, which is why I decided to write this. Long live the Titans!

Has she ever talked this much about _them_? Has she ever talked this much _at all_ would be more appropriate. Brion tapped his pen a bit too harshly against the soft flesh of his hand as a gentle punishment for droning out Tara's voice again. She didn't deserve that. She's _excited_, Brion, he'd have to tell himself every once in a while to keep himself calm. Anxiety wasn't a mystery to him, especially when dealing with the agreement he'd made to the other family members.

"Damn," the expletive managed to slip out whilst his thoughts readied themselves for war against one another.

Tara paused in her recurrence of the incident with Cinderblock and the Teen Titans those few days ago and frowned. Her eyebrows inched together in concern as she brushed her elder brother's arm with her forefingers. "Sorry, did you need me to calm down?"

He'd looked down at the girl with amused confusion, his eyes tracing lines over the soft contours of her face as she spoke words he wasn't quite sure he was prepared to respond to. "Ah…no. Production at Wayne Industries is ridiculous these days, so they're asking more of _everyone_, especially the accountants. Financial stuff like that, nothing I'd want you to worry about."

"You're sure?" she inquired, lifting up from her place at the table and taking the dinner plates from the pair's meal with her to the kitchen.

Brion nodded, knowing full well she wouldn't have any knowledge whether or not he'd actually acknowledged her at all. He chuckled into the back of his large hand and resolved to reply with something that'd be of inconvenience to his sister. "'Sure' isn't something anyone can say with ease anyway. 'Positive' is a better word."

With a sloppy clatter, the dishes made their descent to the bottom of the kitchen sink what with Tara leaving her post and standing in the entrance to the room with her hands firmly planted on her slender hips. "Are you seriously correcting my grammar? _Now_?"

"Language Arts, actually." The young man retorted quickly whilst sticking his tongue out in a playful, albeit childish manner.

"And _again_! I was trying to help!" the blond huffed before her older brother could get another word in. The once worried expression etched into her azure eyes was now one of annoyance and distaste.

He rose from his place at the table and waltzed over to his sister, pressing a chaste kiss to her forehead before plopping himself down on the sofa sitting in the same spacious room. "And you did! Were you going to finish your story?"

Tara grumbled a slew of incoherent words that were more than likely to be insults, though she still followed suit and sat beside the condescending gentleman. "About Tuesday? I guess I've already told you that a few times already, right?"

"More than that, but hero stories are supposed to be exciting, right?" Brion remarked, not bothering to look at his sister as image after image flicked across the television screen just as his fingertip pressed at the tiny button on the remote control. "Your friends must've been jealous that you could talk so…casually with Raven and Beast Boy."

"Just Beast Boy. Raven talked to him, but not me. They did the smile and wave thing again, and I don't think anyone had time to be jealous in between Cinderblock freaking out and the Titans jumping in to save the day. We were all pretty surprised, after all." She affirmed, toying with her fingers as she did so.

Brion scratched his arm absentmindedly as he listened carefully to his sister, as he always did. His coarse brows grew closer to his gentle blue eyes as exasperation pumped all too quickly throughout his every nerve ending. Things were becoming too comfortable, too _normal_.

It upset him so furiously, though, because the entire situation was all but simple, as Tara blatantly wished it could be. She _wasn't_ a friend of the Titans. She wasn't even supposed to be near heroism in general, but Brion had a heart, and knew that any true member of the Markov family could never evade the seductive call of justice. If it wasn't going to be Jump City that set off the first cog in the machine, it very well would have been something else. As much as both the young salary man and his sister hoped, _prayed_ even, simplistic was simply not an adjective native to their story. Nothing about them ever was, or could be.

Glancing faster than necessary between the blond adolescent and the television set - irascibility increasing all the while, mind you – Brion gutturally cleared his throat and clicked the incredibly _condescending_ thing to rest; both Tara _and_ the television. "Listen, it's been a long day. I'll be getting some sleep now…"

Tara looked up at her brother's receding figure as he sauntered from the living room to the hallway, a puzzled expression holding her facial features in hand all the while. "And I'll be doing…?"

"Anything, I suppose. It's not supposed to be good parenting or some such nonsense, but sleep when you want to. Just finish your homework." called the – now slightly echoed - man's voice.

"Okay…?" the student murmured softly to herself as she fell to her side on the couch. She hadn't intended on finding sleep, though it certainly had been preying on the poor defenseless thing _hours_ in precedence. Images flashed before her long before closed eyes; those she could not recognize.

There were _people_, and a hell of a lot of them at that. There were ladies in large dresses the Tara Markov of today would describe as "puffy", and men in war uniforms complete with their small gold stars depicting their skill. There was a little lady there too, wearing both a frustrated expression and a miniature version of the older women's attire, in purple. And often times, the mental slides would switch from the angry little girl to a happy teenager.

The happy one of the two girls, who Tara assumed were one and the same, was not in the strange clothing. She wasn't even surrounded by any of the same people either. There were a few very recognizable faces in that group of photos. They were the…

And that was it. Tara knew she'd known them outside of this strange and slightly off-putting photo album inside her mind, though each and every name she could pull by memory was lost now. That is, except hers. Tara Markov was the only person she knew that existed most definitely, and this desolate slew of photos depicted nothing that even _remotely_ reminded her of…_her_.

"Do you know who she is yet?" said a voice very recognizable, though terrifying in the same respect.

Suddenly what Tara was looking at was not just the photos, but a room lined with all those that she'd seen that night, and some on other nights she couldn't recall; most likely nights she'd never be able to recall again if things progressed as slowly as many wanted them to. She was looking down at herself in the room, as if she were a cameraman and the show was unfolding below her. She wasn't alone, and the Tara in the room appeared to be frightened by that fact.

"N-no! I don't even know who _you_ are! I can hardly tell who _I_ am in this place!" The blond screamed out of fear and frustration with her own mind. Was _she_, or rather, her own mind torturing herself like this?

The dark haired woman frowned immediately after the words were tossed into the open air, as if they'd hurt her personally. Tara tugged at her hair and shut her eyes in a fit of anger as the familiarity of this stranger was too obvious for her not to know.

"Your name is…! Ugh, your name is…!" she shouted as tears began to pour down either side of her face. Why couldn't she just _remember_? She couldn't say a thing to set her feelings at ease, and she knew that. _That_ was what truly had been the prick in her side that just could not dissipate. Her name was Tara Markov, and she knew what she knew, but at that moment and as she would gradually discover, Tara Markov knew _nothing_.

The unknown woman sighed and tugged off her dark blue hood to reveal a hauntingly pale face, a dejected frown, and cold emotionless indigo eyes. Her similarly hued hair grew gently, though messily, to her shoulders, and a few loose strands framed her countenance. At the peak of her hairline was a small crimson jewel that twinkled softly in the meager light the room had. "Raven. My name is Raven, Tara."

Tara glared at the girl, tears pouring heavier and more frantically down her tan cheeks as she continued to do so. It hurt so badly that she couldn't say something so obvious. The one with the cloak was Raven, and her teammates were just as simple. Tara tried many times in her head to list of those names, and failed that exact amount as well.

"And you _used_ to call me an even more personal name. You remember." Raven spat more than conveyed. The aura she gave off was uncomfortable and shaken, though her expression and tone of voice remained that same, ominous form of cold. No, not even "cold" could accurately describe how far away she'd seemed, _frigid_.

"Raven, please..."

"_Rachel_. You called me _Rachel Roth_,"

"But I don't…I can't…"

"You _do_. You _can_," the sorceress said just as monotone as she had before, though she covered her face with her hood yet again. The words toppled onto Tara like objects too heavy to imagine, and she nearly felt her legs give out below her. "Don't do it for me, don't even do it for you. Try as hard as…gah! No!"

The tears stopped just as the Teen Titan fell to her knees and faded from the room. And there she was, alone again with a shuddersome grin spread on her lips. She was alone in someone else's thoughts; someone else's photo album. The memories of the mysterious stranger almost completely fled, but her name was left and erased soon after. _Raven_, Tara had repeated for the last time before she was completely alone without even a thought to keep her company.

On the other end of Jump City sat a large structure in the form of T in the middle of the bay of the same name. All was calm on the outside of world famous Titans Tower, though panic stabbed through the hearts of each of its five heroic inhabitants.

"Raven!" resident alien powerhouse shouted in worry as her friend returned to consciousness, her hands cradling either of the aforementioned heroine's shoulders.

The Azarathian teenager blinked once or twice, the number hadn't mattered at all to her. After the near horrific experiences she'd survived through, specifically the one only a few life altering seconds ago, Raven wasn't quite sure that number would ever mean anything at all. "…Kori." The sorceress sat up and patted the alien's hand to allow her comfort, and to give her notice to release her impeccably strong hold on Raven's shoulders.

"You're alright…right? If anything happened, I-I'm sorry I made you…" Beast Boy started nervously, rubbing his upper arm vigorously in guilt and worry. It would have been his fault if Raven, or anyone had gotten hurt getting involved with Terra. His obsession with her was something fracturing his friends mentally and emotionally, and he himself, surely, in someway.

"I'm fine. Tara's mind is damaged, though. Badly. There's so much repression there, so much _pain_ she's inflicting on herself even though she doesn't have to. It affected me a bit when I got there, and she noticed." Raven said hastily as she looked around at all of her friends' faces. Despite her inability to have emotions of her own, she was in pain because they were so scared for her. It was what she understood to be sadness that filled the room to the ceiling that evening.

Cyborg pulled the empath to her feet and allowed his large hand to linger on her waist in case she needed the extra support, or consolation. "Is there anything we can do to help her?"

Raven groaned and massaged her temples with her index and middle fingers, though listened to what Victor had to say. "Terra isn't going to be back easily. There's a lot of hatred and anger still there."

"That doesn't make any sense. I thought we'd resolved most if not everything underground when she and Slade..." the Titans' leader, Robin, spoke exasperatedly. Highly understandable, as he had no way of understanding what exactly Terra had last thought before she was encased in stone. That, of course, was Raven's task. She'd seen – and sensed – many things in Terra during her time with the Titans, and those things plagued her nightly recollections each and every night after the dreadful event.

"Death doesn't resolve anything except existence, Dick. But, it isn't us she's so…afraid of. It's everything else. She doesn't want to know who she was, and she doesn't want to because…well, I've still got to figure that out." The sorceress droned as her eyes could not find solace in any of her friends' worried faces.

Impatience getting the better of him, the green skinned changeling growled in protest. "Then go back! If this is the last chance we have to get her back, then why don't we _do_ something?! I'm sick of being the only one who cares!"

"_Beast Boy_," Koriand'r murmured sadly as her fingers gripped his shoulder tightly, "Another night, please. Raven has done much to aid us _all_ in our rescue, so let us allow her time to rest."

A/N: Please, please, please, _please_ review! I adore this story so much, and I really hope you all love it too.


	3. Living is Easy With Eyes Closed

**Disclaimer: I do not own, nor do I claim ownership of, Teen Titans. I do, however, own the plot, so if you want to use it, ask first please!**

**A/N: Might I just say that this entire chapter was inspired by the song "Strawberry Fields Forever" by The Beatles. I have no idea why, but that song makes me think of Raven, so...here. Look for the author's note at the bottom of the page in each chapter for responses to my reviews, by the by. :P**

Her name was Terra. She had terminated, she had dominated, and she had mortified. She was a traitor, a liar, and abandoned all whom she cared for in a short amount of time. Her wrath shook Jump City from the ground up, and her death shook her best friends, the Teen Titans, more than anyone could have imagined.

They were heroes, and _she_ was a hero at one point as well. A mad man had taken advantage of her incredible power and her insecurity, and used her to rule all that his sinister hands could grasp. Terra fought until her own power buried both she and the evil Slade alive, and was never heard from, or of, again. And though Terra's life had been taken from her, the Titans were forced to continue protecting their city – their _world_ – without fail.

At the time, it had seemed no one could have suspected the young super heroine of anything, though there was one who knew better. She had seen it occur before her very eyes from the moment Terra had stumbled upon the team of teen heroes, though she had said nothing. That decision was one Raven was positive she'd spend the rest of her life regretting.

"I'm Terra!" a once bright eyed young girl had spoken proudly. She stood at a relatively small stature with dirt caked to her face and clothes. Terra certainly hadn't looked prepared at all to play the part of a super hero, though the other Titans found her strength and amazing ability to mold the earth at her will to make up for what she lacked.

Raven had stared through indifferent, cold eyes at her newest teammate that day. The moment she'd uttered her first few words to the others, the empath was well aware of the great hesitancy and insufficiency in control that lay beneath the blond haired adolescent's magnificent bravado. As was one thing Raven had to commend Terra for, her convincing acting skills.

Even the sorceress herself believed for a short while that the blond's previously debatable loyalty to the Titans had become a distorted sort of reality, though she knew it was only false hope. And as false hope would always promise, doom came about quite quickly after the much-too-late revelation. Raven had spent every night since Terra's demise dreaming of what memories she had seen of the girl's. There were nights where she avoided sleep completely in order to let the situations pass her by for just once, and there were nights where the sight of Slade had become so haunting it'd flashed before her eyes every time she blinked.

The previous evening would have marked the first time the empath had allowed her entire consciousness to venture into the deep, twisted and all so disturbing throws of her ex-teammates mind. Tara Markov was indeed the teen vigilante turned dastardly apprentice, Raven was well aware from the start, though it took her more than what one could call "a while" to accept the fact that the source of her sleepless nights was still alive and well - and most importantly – not suffering as well.

It was selfish to want to drag Terra back into the Hell she had created for herself and banished her friend to for what was to be assumed as an eternity. Raven knew, but she could care less. She wasn't helping Tara become herself again for Tara's sake, or the Titans' for that matter. Simply in Raven's best interest to be at the aid of the geomancer; her _sanity_ was at risk the longer that girl denied the girl – the hero – she had once been.

Raven sat uncomfortably on the edge of the Titans Tower roof, her legs dangling without a purpose from the building's sides as she gazed out at the shimmering water below. It was early morning, she would assume, being it was much too late for her friends to still be awake, though much too early for the sun to even dare and peak its gleaming face over the bleak horizon. The heavy grey clouds hovered both in the sky and on the water, and the dark haired teenager frowned as they slowly made their way across the bay's face. It was as if they were running away; a phrase she commonly associated with the young school girl who went by the name of Tara.

"Nothing to get hung up about," sounded a familiar voice, as if someone had been called up to perform something extraordinary in front of an audience of strangers, though there had only been one stranger this time, and no stage, and certainly no performance. Nothing extraordinary, even. Only Raven, armed with her arsenal filled to the point of busting with solemn thoughts and unnerving memories, of course.

The slender young Azarathian turned slightly, leaning onto her now extended arm as her companion took a seat beside her. "What are you talking about? I thought I-No, I _knew_ I made you upset when I didn't go back for her."

Beast Boy chortled, though there was nothing upbeat about the young Titan's most common expression this time. He was still upset, Raven could sense that much, but it wasn't aimed at anyone in particular. In fact, even before things with Tara had turned for the worse, that same melancholy lurked over his every action, though the violet haired empath never found it so compelling as to confront him about it.

His typical smile turned into a slightly awkward frown, and Raven turned her head to the gurgling Jump City Bay waters once again. "I was. Sorry about that, though. Starfire stopped me before I said anything _too_ stupid, so that's good, right?"

Raven hadn't been amused in the slightest by her friend's attempt at making things seem less unfortunate than they really were. She did have to admire his will to cheer her up, though. If Garfield could ever be considered good at anything besides heroism, it was persistence. "Don't be sorry. It only means you care, and that's the whole reason why we're doing this. If we stop caring, there's no hope for Terra to ever come back. Lack of care is what locked her up there in the first place."

"Locked her up…where?" the changeling inquired, his pointed ears drooping slightly in meek suspense.

A dark eye meandered from its looking place facing the barely lit scenery that was the ocean lapping up at the shore and traveling across the vastness of the bay all the way up to lick the base of the livid early morning sky over to the friendly green face sitting a few feet away. He was intrigued, and the idea of the fun loving, mild mannered, Beast Boy itching for knowledge gave Raven an ironic sort of happy, though it disappeared in an instant – as expected - and she began her response with an uneasy sigh. "It's hard to explain, Gar. She keeps the Terra we know in a room where there is nothing but pictures. The room doesn't let the other girl remember much of anything. She couldn't even say my name because she honestly had no idea what it was."

Cocking his head to the side, Garfield toyed with the idea for a while in his mind. He looked between Raven and his fingers that pressed much too roughly against the tower's roof. He was confused, and he didn't like it at all. It was disheartening that he couldn't understand the closest thing to Terra he'd just been _handed_, so it'd only slip through his fingers just like everything that'd led up to the betrayal.

There was so much that wasn't said that should have been, and so much that was that shouldn't have even been _thought_. When Terra fled the tower the first time, he felt so much rage aimed at the young man who had led he and his friends to victory many times before, though he repressed it and chose not to blame him for something that really wasn't his fault. _Be the bigger man_, Beast Boy had been lectured by Steve Dayton, his _father_, many times before. It was his influence that kept him sane that day, a great leader's influence; a great leader, just like Robin.

The angry thoughts Garfield occasionally found himself thinking resurfaced again that morning, and he balled his fingers together to make a fist. The sound of his gloves scraping against the rough building material on Titans Tower made him cringe all the more. Everyone had their place in the tower. Dick was the brain of the team, Vic the mechanics, Kori was the heart, Rachel the order and stability…so, what did that make him? The sense of humor? The _joke_?

"Quit it," the empath ordered through the calm façade she always seemed to position on her pale face. "You're not 'the joke' and you know it. You're a Titan, Gar, a member of the _family_."

He sighed heavily and took his first look out at the bay along with Raven. The waves were gentle and made a calming kind of sloshing, and the stars above twinkled meagerly in the bright city's dark sky. "Yeah, okay, _mom_. So, what's out there, you think?"

Closing her eyes and inhaling, the empath took a while to collect the most alleviating thoughts she could convey to the boy as not to continue the conversation. She wanted to control what she could of the situation, and not set the topic back to Terra and bring back the crippling regret and anger that she knew she couldn't even think of setting upon someone else. "Fish."

"Was that a joke? From _you_?" Gar chuckled in disbelief, letting his hands finally ease themselves out of their tensed state. "Dude, I can't wait to tell Terra!"

Raven flinched at the mention of the name and the corners of her mouth dropped in reaction. Her hands fell to her lap and her eyes traveled up to the obscured moon. The grey clouds had transcended their previous position in the middle of the sky and further obscured the already pathetic excuse for light the moon had harbored. "You assume that once she gets her memory back she'll come back."

Taken aback, the changeling furrowed his dark green brows in confusion and hoped he'd misunderstood. "Wait, _why_? Did she say something when you…?"

"No, she screamed and sobbed and forced me out of her mind before I could make any progress." The empath retorted just as emotionless as ever. Her eyes seemed flat, as if they were staring at an invisible wall in front of them, and her face lacked color just as it always did.

Everything about her was monotone; neither positive, nor negative. Beast Boy bit at his bottom lip in a simple kind of frustration; the kind that he knew would never be resolved as long as Raven remained as reserved as could be expected. "Should I want her back when she's…well, back?"

"She may hate us if we bring her back," she started with a heavy sigh as her thin shoulders sunk. "There's a reason why she's doing what she's doing. There's a reason for everything."

"That doesn't mean she has to hate us! She could be…afraid that we'll reject her, and we won't. Right, Rae?" the oddly hued teenager more so stated, rather than asked.

_You're not mad, are you Rae?_ The traitor had spat at Raven while she trembled in the slippery, cold mud. The Azarathian's mind reverted back to that night, her eyes glazed over in complete and utter hatred. She had felt more emotion than should _ever_ have been allowed, and she did so little compared to the fantasy that had flashed in between the lines as she took on a form comparable to her father's.

She had grown large, four eyes clouded over in a crimson so deliciously sinister that struck fear throughout the small girl's body. Raven had her forced against the wall, hissing and growling and tossing the largest and most obscure objects she could find at Terra as she backed away in fear. Though the thoughts disgusted Rachel every time she'd thought about it afterward, all she wanted was to see her in _pain_. Of all the emotional and physical damage, and – above all – _betrayal_ Terra had inflicted upon the people she had referred to as "friends", Raven wanted to give her all that pain and more in one final, perfect blow.

There was blood in Raven's eyes, as short fantasy after fantasy played out before each of her involuntary projectiles missed the target. She had seen it all play out. Terra being maimed by pointed objects, having bones broken _so_ much further beyond disrepair, and even murdering the teenager with her own bare hands. It would have been a pride for the moment, with all the malevolence and vengeful energy bubbling at levels Raven couldn't even try to ignore, though she was sure if she had indeed killed Terra that night, she'd be tortured far worse than she was already.

"Rae? _Rae_?" Garfield called obliviously, waving his hands before his teammate's face.

The wine haired empath squinted her dark eyes in animosity and gave a sharp order to her companion before disappearing into a portal of what Beast Boy could only describe as complete and utter nothingness. "Garfield, don't you _ever_ call me that again! _Azarath metrion zinthos_!"

Closing her eyes and repeating the phrase over and over as if death would come if she dare stopped, Raven meditated upon small, hovering plot of land in a brumal world with scarlet wisps comparable to soft, warm white clouds of Jump City. Stars similar to those of the city's twinkled just the same, just as the sky was still obsidian and just a little intimidating. There was no breeze to be spoken, nor thought of, and the only living creature in the entire lonely dimension was the young empath repressing her anger as best as her self-control would allow.

"Azarath metrion zinthos…" her raspy voice had settled back into its average state, no where near as frantic and frightened and nearly demonic as when she'd first appeared. Refusing to open her eyes, Raven continued her chant with that same careless tone she'd taken on everything else with.

Anger wouldn't get the best of her, anyone would know. Her name was Rachel Roth, the half demon super heroine who could keep the embodiment of evil at bay; she could keep a little pent up rage stowed away in her generous supply of suppressed emotions. She was the mysterious Titan, the one nobody knew simply because she chose for things to play out in such a way.

Her name was Raven. She was powerful, stood alone because she _wanted_ it that way, and she could suppress everything and anything she needed to in order to keep the heroes on top. She was an empath, a telepath, and held herself accountable for all that had happened to her friends because of the traitor Terra. She was fearless because fear was just another emotion that she could not allow existence, though she wakes up in terror every night all because of a girl named Tara Markov.

**A/N: Thanks for the reviews everybody! I'm really glad people actually read this thing. Heh. Sorry if this chapter kinda sucked, I had a serious case of writer's block, but I should be back on my feet pretty soon.**

**Heroboy163: I'm glad you like it! I only update slowly because I don't get enough reviews *coughHINT!cough***

**Mr. Joey Bon: They use each others real names because they are real people outside of their super hero aliases, you know. The mask DOES come off, prior to popular belief..._**


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